Believe in Yourself

A year ago I embarked on my Color of Woman Intentional Creativity teacher training.  It helped me through my first year as a widow, pouring myself into writings, the canvas, and holding space with my COW sisters.  In the middle or I should say toward the end of the training I moved.  The move consumed all my energy and time.   When I was finally in my new home I lost my focus and did not graduate in November.  I was so close, only a few more assignments left but I was tired emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually.  I left my home where I spent my entire married life, the home my husband took his last breath in, and moved to a completely new location.  I took an extension, not truly knowing if I would complete my training, and I am so thankful I did!!!

Believe in yourself, your gifts, your purpose. My initiate book is being printed, I have finished the last three writing assignments.   The moon is a waxing gibbous moon! Wow! Your secret medicine is budding, fruit is forming, take time to notice adjust and refine!!! 


Day 7 Deep Nourishment Challenge

This one was tough for me, sharing me!  On this spiritual path journey to find my secret medicine the word dance keeps showing up. And the other day the question I am the one who . . . Dances was the answer. I used to dance a LOT as a child and into my 30s and then stopped. I need to dance again!  Thank you so much Lainie Love Dalby for helping me nourish myself and speak my voice.

 

My Voice

I am hoping to share my voice with you, to be who I am meant to be.

It has been 31 days since my sweet husband lost his 14 month battle with cancer.  We kept it quiet as much as possible.  It’s what he wanted.  He wanted people to remember him how he was when he was healthy, not how he was at the end.  At first I was angry with everyone, God and even Richard for getting sick.  I cried, what about me, what about my life.  How selfish am I?  For better or worse, in sickness and in health, ’til death do us part.

Thus began my spiritual journey.  I gave it up to God, the Divine, put it in his hands.  One night I had a powerful vision, I won’t call it a dream, as it was not a dream.  My DOD (dear ole dad) came to me and took me on a walk, down a narrow path which I was afraid to take.  I told him, no, there is nothing ahead, just darkness, an abyss.  My dad told me to hold his hand and to have faith.  As we walked, the path became a little wider, it was still very wobbly, the path was made of rocks, some large, some small, I had to be careful with my footing.  We continued on for what seemed like forever.  My dad then told me to look up as I had been looking down watching my footing, not wanting to look to the side as there was nothing by darkness.  NO!  I’m afraid.  Look, Marshy, look up.  I did. I saw a bright white light, I felt hope.  My heart was filled with such joy.  The darkness was gone.  My dad said to me, you are going to be fine.

My journey of healing myself and caring for Richard began, unconditionally, with love and support until the very end.  I prayed for a peaceful release.  He fell asleep in his recliner watching football.

Once again I am reaching out and giving it up to God, the Divine, to guide me on my new chapter in my life.  Life has changed for me, my address will change, I will change.

When Richard was first diagnosed he told me, I need you to be STRONG.  This is my mantra for the coming year, my 2nd renaissance is beginning, BE STRONG.

Timing is everything.  Janet Conner’s 30-day Soul Program began this month.  I was blessed to be one of the scholarship recipients.  The program is called The Lotus and the Lily “access the Wisdom of Buddha and Jesus to Nourish Your Beautiful, Abundant Life”.

I met Janet in an online retreat.  She is infectious.  This is my second course with her.  If you are wanting more in your life, to find your purpose, reconnect to your inner self, walk with me on my journey with The Lotus and the Lily.  I’d love to walk with you on yours.

We started week one.  Week two starts Monday.  There is still time to join in!

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